Forevermore

Last Thursday in my Human Biology class our professor confirmed that we would be having an exam today. Since then I have not really slept because every time I closed my eyes I thought of all the different ways I was going to fail this exam. Last night I could not fall asleep because my head was spinning with all of the different biology terms that I memorized. Then the second that I woke up I rolled out of bed and starting viewing my flashcards, before realizing that I still had to make it through psychology.

By the end of psychology my heart was racing, and my head was spinning. Walking over to the science building was interesting because I almost ran into a couple people because I was so focused on getting to my classroom and going through my note cards one more time. In case you haven't realized it by this point, I have extreme test anxiety. It has gotten so bad because I expect perfection from myself, and I feel that any mistakes I make are a sign of failure. I have always been an "honors" student, but when it came to taking the SAT's they did not reflect my abilities very well. I know that I am not the only one that faces this problem, but it is a problem that I have to deal with.

When my professor handed out the exam, I stopped and took a deep breath. While I was taking that breath song lyrics got stuck in my head. The song was not one that I had listened to in a long time, but am currently listening to right now. The lyrics that were stuck in my head are as follows:

"Lift up your eyes to the One who reigns, Lift up your hands, oh sweet surrender it brings, Forevermore, You are holy, Forevermore, You are worthy"

I kept singing those lyrics in my head over and over, and instead of that being a distraction from my exam, it made me more confident in my answers. I have been praying all week, and then this morning on my way to take the exam I prayed for my nerves to be calmed because I felt like I was going to throw up. The moment that I put pencil to paper there was a sort of peace that I was getting from the lyrics of that song. God was bringing me comfort through music. It sounds kind of unrealistic, but I know that's where the lyrics came from, and where my peace came from.

No mater what the prayer is, be ready for the answer, and be ready for the comfort, no matter what form the Lord sends it as. For me, a peace was sent through music, for you it might be something big or something little. Rely on the Lord to calm you and turn your eyes and your heart to Him.