Two years ago this month I was deciding on the schools that I was going to apply to. Two of my choices were Christian colleges while the other two were state schools. I began getting really excited to go to school, and I really began leaning toward a Christian University. I prayed about it all the time looking for the path that God had set out for me. And then all of a sudden I believed the answer had fallen into my lap. An amazing Christian school reached out to me so I applied and I was accepted right away! The school is very expensive but I believed that God had sent me that school, so He would send the money too. When I couldn't find enough money to attend I was devistated, but I remembered that I had been accepted at another Christian university.
I sent the other school my first payment and I was officially enrolled for the following fall semester. Again I believed that it was the path that the Lord wanted me to take, but once I had my knee surgery, everything changed. I could not longer attend the Christian university because it was out of state and my surgeon, and doctors were in Connecticut. What I didn't know then is that it was going to take another six months for me to learn to walk again. I spent many nights crying because I could not understand why God wanted me at Eastern and not a Christian college.
I spent a year being angry, and resentful. I did not want to be at this University and I spent so much time trying to get away from here. I wanted to be where I wanted to be not where God wanted me to be. I could not believe that the Lord had put me at this school to be tormented and hurt. This whole time I have been trying to please myself, and make sure that I'm happy where I am. I put my focus on me and my problems and not the ones that I should be focusing on. I felt a lack of trust and safety because I didn't get the answer that I prayed for. However the Lord made a promise to us:
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not the harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
It wasn't until today that I finally realized what I can be doing at this school. Here I am, at a public university, where there are hundreds of people who do not know the Lord. I missed an entire year of opportunity because I was more concerned about asking why and not listening to the answer. The Lord obviously thought that I was strong enough to handle this university because He put me here. I finally feel a sort of peace that I have been missing. I am ready for the Lord to use me and speak through me.
So my challenge for you today is to look at your life and see if you are missing any opportunities to share the gospel or the truth of the Lord. The next time that you want to ask the Lord why, make sure that you are really ready for the answer that He gives you. It is not an easy thing to do, but imagine how many lives we can save just by listening and preaching the word to the non-believers that we interact with every day.
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