His Plan For Me

Earlier this week I wrote about a decision that we had to make. I said that it was something my family had been praying about, but that I was the one holding us back. Each of us had a part in not letting it all go to God, because it interfered with the future that we desired. After many months are fighting with God and fighting with ourselves, we finally turned it all over. It was the hardest thing that I have done in a very long time. There is great freedom in letting go, and there is also great pain.

As I listened to a song by Casting Crowns today I was reminded that God is in control. The lyrics that stood out to me were, "So come on, let Me dream, let Me dream for you, I am strong when you're weak and I'll carry you, So let go of your plan, be caught by My hand, I'll show you what I can do
When I dream for you". These words have such a strong meaning behind them. We all so desperately want control of everything in our lives. We want to control the future because most of us think that we can create a better future for ourselves.

Well, I am living proof that God is in control. He is waiting for us to turn it over to Him. We honestly have no idea what He is going to do in our lives or with our lives once we turn the control to Him. Letting go of this burden hanging over our heads just about drained me of my happiness. I was seriously struggling to remain positive. I was about to lose something major. This was something that had previously been intertwined with the future that I imagined for myself. However,  I did it, I let it go and I moved on the best that I could.

Then today happened. Everything that we had been praying for, we thought was answered. We thought that letting go was the answer, but it wasn't. God showed us His future for our lives. It brought joy into our hearts. The heavy weight of the world was not only lifted (symbolically of course), it was replaced by the love of Christ. He filled our broken hearts with love, joy and forgiveness. We have been humbled today. I must say that I regret waiting so long to let Him take control.

The future that He has given me is already so much better than what I had planned. It's funny because for so long, I thought that I knew what I wanted and I thought that He would never answer my prayer. I felt unsettled and disappointed. I cannot explain too much more than this because I am still learning His plan and learning what this new, unimagined (by me) future. Let me tell you, if you have any hesitation about letting something go. Its not worth the stress and the hurt. His ultimate plan for us is already set and though we think we know what we want, His future for us is unimaginable and beautiful.

For the first time in a long while I can lay my head down to sleep and actually rest because I gave my hurt, pain and sorrow to God and He turned it around into beauty and peace.